h.b.d to the best FLOTUS ever!
FIRST THINGS FIRST, HBD (today!!) to the one and only Michelle Obama; pls hold while I immediately redirect you to Barack’s instagram for her special day. OMG.
So, a lot is happening RN and I tried to keep this brief but…yeah, not happening this week. Stay tuned for some impeachment chatter, a ~deep dive~ into the Street Ski trend of 2020, and an intro to the world’s newest soup goddess.
OBLIGATORY POLITICS SECTION:
I just….don’t even know where to begin? JSYK, I’m having trouble caring about the Democratic debate on Tuesday, so I’ll just link this article and call it a day.
- Let’s start here: President Trump is officially on trial for impeachment. I had a lot of questions, and Thursday’s The Daily did a great job of answering them.
- THE PLOT THICCENS!! On Wednesday, Lev Parnas, Rudy Giuliani’s Russian henchman who is deeply embroiled in the Ukraine scandal, told the NYT that Trump knew everything about the effort to push Ukraine to investigate the Bidens and the 2016 election. Can you say incriminating??? On a silly note: this compilation of photos of Lev with big wig Republicans is just spectacular. For example, here he is with the Kushners:
- If you want a big ole politics TL;DR: I really liked The Hill’s morning report from this am, which covers everything from Trump’s delusional tweet yesterday to Senator Susan Collins (of Maine, go u bears!) causing a ruckus to the bizarre and esoteric ceremonial ritual of impeachment…
ON BEING A SHE/HER/HERS THIS WEEK:
Put simply, it wasn’t the best week to have ovaries.
- D-R-A-M-A amongst the populists: a full-blown rift is underway between Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren after a report came out this week alleging that, in a 2018 meeting, Sanders told Warren that a woman can’t win the 2020 election. This feud is kinda a big deal, especially with regards to sexism, and I really appreciated The Cut’s take on the sexist implications and Nate Silver’s take on what he calls the Democratic primary “silly season”.
…..For more, check out Warren & Sanders’ extremely awkward interaction after Tuesday’s debate….YIKES. - On Wednesday, Virginia became the 38th state to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment. Symbolically, this is beautiful, but we’re in a bit of a pickle: pls recall from US Gov class that amendments become laws when ratified by 3/4 of state legislatures — aka 38/50 states — however the deadline for ratification was in 1982, so no one knows if this will actually happen.
→ If, like me, you’re confused about why the EFF has it taken SO LONG for the country to ratify an amendment that promises “equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of sex”, I suggest this NYT article. - In a disturbingly unsurprising turn of events, no women were nominated for the Oscars’ “Best Director” category. Huge bummer overall, but especially for Greta Gerwig. Thanks to @Issa Rae for throwing some well-deserved shade to those d-bags at the Academy.
TWO THINGS THAT WENT VIRAL ON THE INTERWEBS:
- Serenity by Gwenyth (The Office™️ joke, anyone?): In classic Gwenyth fashion, GOOP released a candle entitled “This Smells Like My Vagina” and, even at $75, it sold out immediately. Let’s get one thing straight tho: the candle does not smell like her privates, unless her vj smells like “geranium, citrusy bergamot, and cedar absolutes juxtaposed with Damask rose and ambrette seed”.
- Colbert’s take on the candle and Goop’s upcoming Netflix show is SO FUNNY. I was particularly tickled when he called Gwenyth’s nether regions her “Goopshoot”. If you have 5 min, pls watch.
- People are losing it over this extremely DTF (@boomers, this is what DTF means, sorrey) tortoise, Diego, who produced over 800 offspring and helped save his species from extinction. He was retired (probably against his will) from intercourse this week, but I’d still like to say congrats on the sex, Diego!
A Silly Exploration into the Obsession with Ski Culture:
DO YOU EVEN APRES??? It’s just….the appropriation of ski culture is, quite simply, everywhere. From Kylie Jenner to Rent the Runway to Kith to city-dwelling microinfluencers, no one is safe from the cultural obsession that is looking ~good~ fresh off the slopes, even if you weren’t even on the slopes, not even for one run.
- First, a history lesson on après from Powder Mag here. Apparently, “ground zero” for après was at the Austrian Alps resort, St Anton, and let me tell you, it looks lit.
- Now, riddle me this: is après-ski-wear the nouveau (while we’re using French words), higher-brow athleisure? Could it be that this sweater that simply says “ski”, is, perhaps, the perfect indication that you have reached the pinnacle of leisure, athletic prowess, wealth, and culture? It’s like, lemme flex that a) first things first, I know how to ski b) I can ski fast c) I’m down to delete beverages après skiing d) my pronoun is ski bunny e) I ski and I speak French and f) yes, of course, I’ve been to Aspen.
- Moving on to ski suits, because this entire lewk must match or else: I want to wear these under all of this and also all of this. Thought you were done with Gwenyth for the day? Think again. Add these perfect Goop ski suits here and here to my hypothetical cart ASAP. Oh, and don’t worry, even your dog can get in on the fun.
- Want more? This NY Mag article on the “Street Ski Trend” of 2020 is superbly on-point.
- In conclusion: is Spyder making a comeback?
SOUP:
There have been some VERY important updates in the soup world this week.
- The New Yorker is getting in on the soup craze with this lovely little story about a soup recipe named Roberto that went viral. And, surprise, surprise, there’s a special shoutout to oft discussed soup celeb @Alison Roman.
- BUT MOVE ON OVER Alison, there’s a new soup-fluencer in town: our very own @ EPETERS has made a soup instagram, @sundays.are.for.soup, that is sure to be a ginormous hit in the soup community. Like, comment, & subscribe, but don’t @ her.
- Side note, here is Emma’s review for Roman’s new soup recipe: “5/10. It has nothing on The Stew. (Also broccoli rabe is hard AF to track down, defeating the soup’s entire purpose as a “pantry soup”!!).” RETWEET about broccoli rabe.
ALAS, SOME FINAL THOUGHTS:
READ: This profile of Larry David in GQ is truly perfect. Highlight: he just took a DNA test, turns out he’s 100% a distant cousin of Bernie Sanders (@boomers, this sentence pays homage to the Lizzo hit, “Truth Hurts”).
ALSO READ: ManRepeller is going crazy over Larry David’s (he really is a firsty-lasty) fashion theory about being “half-dressed” in aforelinked article.
WATCH: Julia Louis-Dreyfus’s son is dipping his toes into the comedy world with this web series, Sorry Charlie. After you watch Colbert discuss Gwenyth’s Goopshoot, might I suggest streaming the first episode of Sorry Charlie?
UNICORNS ARE REAL: ClassPass officially gained unicorn status after closing a $285 million Series E investment (sheesh, these rounds go up to E?!) and a billion-dollar valuation.
HUH?: Kooky new development in the AWAY drama that I keep bumping: Steph Korey, the co-founder and CEO who announced she would step down after the big rumpus, pulled a fast one and is actually coming back as co-CEO.
MEGXIT, EH?: If, like myself, you’re wondering why Meghan and Harry are uprooting themselves to Canada, this New Yorker piece will shed some light.
RE: PLUMBER’S CRACK: I have some unfortunate news: low-rise jeans are back, as evidenced by Gucci’s runway show on Tuesday. Paris Hilton (wherever she is) must be absolutely overjoyed.
REGARDING MOON BOOTS: More unfortunate news: they’re also back. I hate it, but I kinda love it. That is all.
Well, that is IT for this week, thanks for reading!!!!!!!
Fondly,
Char
